La Belle Epoque - Tamquam Alter Idem

Licentia Liquendi

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{Zadie Smith:White Teeth}{Norton Juster:The Phantom Tollbooth}

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Tuesday, August 22, 2006

away

off to Malacca short holiday will be back Friday see you guys!

belle epoque at 12:59 PM

Sunday, August 20, 2006

bad translations-into good poetry!

is there any life in you? I am frenetic, that it is only one illusion, yet I am sober, it is like fiction that today, life is like a man with a big hat

belle epoque at 11:42 PM

to the airport! the wonderful wizard of oz!

how can you tell the difference between letting something slide, letting something go, and internalising the anger so you don't say anything about it but wish you did?
I guess the difference is one involves not caring, another involves you caring about yourself more than the other party (thus saving yourself the agony) and I can't for the life of me figure out the last, though its the one i seem to do the most.

And today I realised I've always had problems with East and West. I recenetly just realised Jurong East is not in the East, and in fact its name refers to it being the East part of Jurong, and Jurong is actually in the West. So when I saw a bus that morning on that way to the mrt, that said BOON LAY 45 MINS I was all game to jump on until a voice in my head started shrieking at me not to get on the bus because Changi was on the other side of the island(and it didn't stop until I got on the mrt)

belle epoque at 11:36 PM

Friday, August 18, 2006

je ne veux pas travailler

Here is the latest song I really like: Sympathique by Pink Martini

My room is a cage
the sun streams through the window
the bellhops are at my door
like those little soldiers
who want to take me away

I don't want to work
I don't want to lunch
I want only to forget
and then I smoke

Long ago I knew the smell of love
a million roses
couldn't smell as sweet
Now a single flower in my way
makes me sick

I am not proud of this
life that wants to kill me
It is magnificent
to be simpatico
But I have never known this

Haha the video is so Amelie, so French-film and cheery that I think now at least when I look at my blog I shall feel happy :)

(next up? La vie en rose?)

I would have put up Fly Me To The Moon,but that is a blogging-at-3.47am-in-the-morning-hey-its-so-late-its-early type of music, when I don't know what to feel or how or whether I should, at all

belle epoque at 1:26 AM

Prozac Nation

Here's a quote from a book I'm currently reading, Prozac Nation, apparently depressives get treated on a mixture of Prozac, lithium and beta blockers. Maybe I should start sucking on lithium batteries. But thats, again, like saying I need alcohol so badly, I'll throw in a rub to dissolve in a glass of water and hope it doesn't kill me. haha and here it goes (the quote):

Homesickness is just a state of mind for me. I'm always missing someone or someplace or something. I'm always trying to get back to some imaginary somewhere. My life has been one long longing.

This is very true, and so far the book has been the literary equivalent of Nirvana. I suddenly feel like listening to a lot of Nirvana.

Was reading my friends blog and I quote
FRIENDS ARE FOREVER GIRLS ARE WHATEVER
(or in my case boys) hahaha its a cute quote really
but wondering, what if I have neither

belle epoque at 1:05 AM

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Some quotes

Foreword: I am insane. Why. Why. Why.

Let's start off with Susan Sontag, formerly from the University to which I am going.

-Depression is melancholy minus its charms - the animation, the fits.-

(Susan Sontag (b. 1933), U.S. essayist. Illness As Metaphor, ch. 7 (1978).)

The Irresistible force paradox is a classic paradox formulated as follows:

What happens when an irresistible force meets an immovable object?
Common responses to this paradox resort to logic and semantics.

Logic: if such a thing as an irresistible force exists, then no object is immovable, and vice versa. It is logically impossible to have these two entities (a force that cannot be resisted and an object that cannot be moved by any force) in the same universe.
Semantics: if there is such a thing as an irresistible force, then the phrase immovable object is meaningless in that context, and vice versa, and the issue amounts to the same thing as asking, e.g., for a triangle that has four sides.
This paradox is a form of the omnipotence paradox, but that paradox is most often discussed in the context of God's omnipotence (Can God create a stone so heavy that He cannot lift it?).

The paradox should be understood as an exercise in logic, not as the postulation of a possible reality. According to modern scientific understanding, there are not and indeed cannot be either irresistible forces or immovable objects. An immovable object would have to have infinite inertia and therefore infinite mass. Such an object would collapse under its own gravity and create a singularity. An irresistible force would imply an infinite energy, which by Albert Einstein's equation E = mc2 is equivalent to an infinite mass. Note that, in the modern view, a cannonball which cannot be deflected and a wall which cannot be knocked down are both types of the same (impossible) object: an object with infinite inertia.

An example of this paradox in non-western thought can be found in the origin of the Chinese word for paradox (矛盾), literally "spear shield." This word originates from a story where a seller was trying to sell a spear and shield. When asked how good his spear was, he said that his spear could pierce any shield. Then, when asked how good his shield was, he said that it could defend all spear attacks. Then one person asked him what would happen if he were to take his spear to strike his shield. He could not answer, and this led to the idiom of 自相矛盾, or "self-contradictory".

Another approach to this paradox is to simply state that the object will continue to exist, since by definition an irresistible force is an immovable object.

This is so beautiful.

Commemoration of my 125th entry! 125 is 5 to the power of 3. 5 is a beautiful number...symmetrical. Everyone reading this gets a kiss from me as commemoration. Muah.

belle epoque at 12:21 PM

Today

It was not an entirely bad day. Thanks J for the drink. Orange laced with what claims itself to be vodka.

Exhibit A: whose wildly fluctuating affections are belied by true adoration (rational adoration would be an oxymoron) and demanded by her desperate need to continually be interested in something new and exciting

is loathe to regard (especially today)

Exhibit B: whose choice to embrace an alternative educational path is characterised by blatant (and rather nauseating) lunacy

is a public nuisance in certain regards and is spoken to by no one but

Exhibit C: You wuss. You aimless wuss.

I am just a child
I am just a child
don't hurt me all I want to do
is control you

(I am more than capable of hurting myself.)

belle epoque at 12:13 PM

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

the postcard was signed with a Calligraphy Brush! mini sized! but anyway, this is my fat assed ant :) so cute.

belle epoque at 12:43 PM

the signed part of my postcard!

belle epoque at 12:43 PM

my signed postcard!

belle epoque at 12:43 PM

This is where we played

belle epoque at 12:42 PM

Hiding behind the naked boys

belle epoque at 12:42 PM

In front of Jap paintings

belle epoque at 12:42 PM

Violist,First Violin and Me! (in front of a piece of art I like)

belle epoque at 12:41 PM

Buffet!

belle epoque at 12:41 PM

I like the Men painting at the back (the art pieces can be viewed when pulled out in slots!)

belle epoque at 12:40 PM

Creative picture of Charm and I

belle epoque at 12:40 PM

My Gorgeous new Germany jacket! WOrld Cup!

belle epoque at 12:39 PM

Damn nice food at my dinner the other day (as mentioned in earlier entry)

belle epoque at 12:38 PM

Art Gallery Gig

Ode to Art!
Today's gig went quite well, lots of rich looking people deciding what pieces of art to get...I felt so Bourgeois, crammed between a naked red boy statue and an eastern looking piece of art playing Mozart's Eine Kleine. Haha. Ate interesting things at the buffet, a green tea fondue (!!its all fondue lately! everything is fondue-sized! kaya!green tea!), teriyaki satay like things,chanwamugi(is that it?probably not:( ) the jap egg thing. also a nice sweet grape with rice and some-meat patty. We got autographed postcards from the Japanese artist(a very nice lady), and my second violinist (also a very nice Japanese lady) gave me a fat assed 4 legged ant toy which I shall always keep in my cello:) Acoustics were nice and echoey, bad for hearing but probably hid a lot of things haha. Some lady was so close to me I kept poking her with my bow (accidentally) until she moved away. Then I had BK with K :)
It was rather a pleasant evening...sigh I'll really miss Remix when I'm gone.
Other things played! Mozart Divertimentos, Moon River, Peter Breiner's Here Comes the Sun, from Beatles go Baroque(which I REALLY like), Air on G String and of course Canon. I looked around in interest during that one.

The Unbearable Lightness of Being!

belle epoque at 12:29 PM

Damien Rice

Was awake at 2am listening to Damien Rice while lying in bed. Its strange really, this recurring feeling I always get when I listen to some pieces. feeling that we love as an aesthetic notion, we want to be shrouded in romance and we want our words and gazes to be velvet-soft and viscous.

we love the solitude of the night wind, dry and calm around our shoulders, in love with its own self sufficiency and its silence. It makes no sound because it is confident of its own existence, like two lovers assured of their timelessness; it is not a dead silence but an intense silence which cradles us slowly.

I am awake and thinking of my dream

belle epoque at 1:56 AM

Monday, August 14, 2006

New book!

I also have started on a new book entitled:
STIFF - The Curious LIves of Human Cadavers

Feel kinda sad, it was my childhood ambition to be a pathologist but it hasn't seemed to work out so far. but this is turning out to (heyhey!) be a really good read:D

New video for the moment: Stop Whispering by Radiohead
accidentally discovered because it came after my Brahms Double Concerto Mvt 1 on my Ipod and I couldn't recognise it, but A identified for me!

belle epoque at 12:25 PM

Dinner and a Shot

The reunion Dinner yesterday was pretty good, heaps of food (which I will put up a picture of soon) like abalone, huge fishes, crayfishes(my fave!), curry chicken, roast duck and I lose track.

Went on a French movie binge lately, well, foreign movie anyway. Caught Love me if you dare, which has great visuals and a wonderful storytelling technique, though the concept is deliciously twisted (yet)in a subtle way. Reflects very much on how humanity really is, brutal and selfish yet still searching for beauty, meaning and order.
Goodbye Lenin was more funny than thought provoking, but is still a very good watch in that it talked about how reality is only what you create and now even I don't know to what extent I want to believe that the truth is what I really want.Maybe it only matters to me in principle.
The Return was Russian so I had fun listening to it but the ending was non satisfying. For me at least. I felt two hours closer to death (the movie was around that long and what i got out of that was only ironic role reversal) without having gained much enlightenment in the process. Amelie and A la Folie pas du tout were very well done, the visuals are similar and the liveliness of the film in general was very lovely.

Some films are alive that way, when you watch them, you feel like you're breathing, which is something I realised I haven't done in a long time. I've been tense 24/7 like my shoulders being up to my ears and I've been holding my breath. Somehow lately in life I just feel, physically and in more ways than one, that I've been holding my breath for a very long time. (which is especially strange when you play the cello). Maybe the next real breath I take will be that of chilled and winter air.

Watched The Beat That My Heart Skipped (De battre mon coeur s'est arrêté)at the Cathay PictureHouse today. First time I've been there, but the layout is really lovely, and hearing the guy play Toccata in E minor (former exam piece) and his teacher play the Brahms Rhapsody in G has really inspired me to start practicing again...did the Toccata the minute I got back:)The lead, particularly, was passionate and intense. in general the film was intense, passionate and violent. And I can't help thinking that should be the way I live life. (violence as a romantic artistic and aesthetic notion not real dirty bloodshed). It's very interesting how so many things are similar between a French gangster and a Singaporean child pianist, like the wiping of the piano keys using a small 7.5 by 7.5 piece of cloth from left to right to left and then replacing in pocket. But I suppose someone is just going to pop up and tell me its the same everywhere and spoil my well constructed sense of coincidence.

Well constructed movie also, with the tension building and the proverbial open end, but then I wont spoil it for those who haven't seen it. Once again I see myself reflected in the situation of wanting something perfect and having it conflict with something that seems to give you the most at that moment, but as they said in Nip/Tuck (great show!)today, if you stop striving for Perfection, you might as well kill yourself.

belle epoque at 12:02 PM

Sunday, August 13, 2006

My bowling score!! I'm first! Track my amazing comeback!

belle epoque at 5:30 AM

Eating Strudel

belle epoque at 5:29 AM

At the Bugis building!

belle epoque at 5:29 AM

Yesterday was one of the best days of my recent life

Yesterday was one of the best Saturdays ever, partly because I stuffed it chock full of activities.It started off with 1.quartet practice (in which I learnt the importance of obligatory-cultural-accomodation which required me to eat sweet potato, which i detest, but downed with a smile)

2.then I went for cello! In which I unfortunately decided to don an experimental outfit which made me look like I had no shorts (which I had). (ie my dads shirt because it was a pleasant shade of blue and not because (thanks S) I had decided to look like I just crawled out of my bf's sleepover party.) But it was a good lesson anyway and

3. Then I met N to go photowhoring at Bugis!and to hang out, since I haven't seen him in ages. and to all those who received my sms

Can't talk now I'm going whoring

I now fully understand the true connotations of my message and send you my deepest and gravest apologies. I hope I didn't ruin your afternoon
:(

4.then I went to meet with some pals, fulfilled my bitching quota for the day

5.then I went bowling! I bowled till 1230 UNbelievable, esp since it was with my family, but BUT although my thumb hurt and I throw (the word alone suggests my sad lack of experience in the field/alley/whatever) the ball in a highly unorthodox fashion, I managed to hit 100!(points not pins) for the first time ever! I also noticed several interesting methods of throwing...One is to start a run, gain momentum, then drop the ball at the line ( no follow through ) hoping that the inertia the ball gained with your bodily movement will enable it to complete its journey to the pins.
It works!!
But thats not my method

I then went home
uploaded my pictures!
chatted a bit and got hungry
vodka!
and then I went to bed

I love being busy! I should do it more often:):)

belle epoque at 5:05 AM

Saturday, August 05, 2006

This is also very pretty

belle epoque at 12:30 PM

Very interesting

belle epoque at 12:30 PM

More Stuff!

Notice the Russian military badges! I won them on ebay (63 of them actually) for USD 5 !!!!!!!! such a steal! (I will never know exactly how much unintended truth there was in that last statement, esp since the badges were shipped from Ukraine)

Anyway they are gorgeous! and multifunctional! I have some on my bag now and I plan to liven up some of my outfits with them also
Ahaha.

belle epoque at 12:24 PM

Part of my new extended badge collection

belle epoque at 12:22 PM

My cute new pig Milstein

belle epoque at 12:21 PM

My wrapped phone! with Bling 5 Swarovski crystals

belle epoque at 12:21 PM

What have I been up to lately

I have wrapped my phone! Rather, out of the goodness of my heart, I bought my brother the phone he'd been craving for ages, the Sony Ericsson something 610 i or something along that line, whose most useful function seems to be warping faces in photos such that now he has a picture of me with hippo nostrils for his wallpaper.
Now in dire lack of money, I have inherited his Motorola V3 (only 2 million units less desired than an Ipod!) and Blinged it up for the hell of it. and Heeeere it is!

btw the picture is a Phoenix
wang4 nv3 chen2 feng4 and all that crap
one cool bird

belle epoque at 12:08 PM

I have removed my password

I have removed my password:)I have been convinced that the intimate details of my life should remain a thing of joy to the general public

belle epoque at 12:06 PM

Licentia Liquendi

Archives

Links

Bookpile

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

away

Sunday, August 20, 2006

bad translations-into good poetry!

to the airport! the wonderful wizard of oz!

Friday, August 18, 2006

je ne veux pas travailler

Prozac Nation

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Some quotes

Today

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Art Gallery Gig

Damien Rice

Monday, August 14, 2006

New book!

Dinner and a Shot

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Yesterday was one of the best days of my recent life

Saturday, August 05, 2006

More Stuff!

What have I been up to lately

I have removed my password